Never, unless you count the 7 year old that can't seem to wear pjs AND take his vitamins at the same time...but we're working on that. (And by "working on that" I mean not at all, but trying to accept it as a constant...like soy milk on my floor & my chain smoking diet mtn dews.)
Not that I want to be flashed. It's usually the ones that need to keep their shit under wraps that are eager to run around in a shady trench coat, being sharers. TaaaaDaaaaa! PEEPS.
Probably the same people that go to nude beaches. No ma'am. Nothing you wanna see there. I don't need to see your burnt junk setting up for the spike. Unless I've been drinking & then it would probably be the best entertainment I'd had all day. "You! Not you...Cocktail Wiener over there...you can't bump worth shit." I would definitely not be cool. Tell your bitch to be cool...sorry. Can't. It's like IKEA - just can't get there from here.
I've had the "T-shirt only" discussion with K. GUYS T-shirt only. Just T-shirt and...dangle. I don't need that in my life & I can't handle it. "Are you punishing me for that zombie thing forever ago??!" I apologized for that. Mostly. Granted, I didn't mean it, but I gave an 85% kind of attempt at a straight face & practiced my sad, empathic eyes in the mirror. "I am super sorry that you have a for real, full-on irrational fear of a zombie attack. While I DID prey on your deepest fears & will laugh about it again in the future, please do not push me down in the unlikely event we are fleeing from a zombie horde.". With any luck, they'd eat the kids first anyway...
There was effort of some sort. And it's not like I let the zombie use his toothbrush.
Ok. I DID let the zombie use his toothbrush.
And I took a picture & sent it to him.
After I posted it on Facebook.
Keeping the romance alive...
Longer, leaner, faster, stronger!
Ashley
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